How do you respond to a child who announces, "I've lost my work ethic?"
My creative juices are running on empty, so I'm open to any and all suggestions.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Ado Annie
If you're familiar with the musical Oklahoma!, then you know that Ado Annie is the girl who "caint say no." Ado Annie 2.0 lives at our house, but she answers to the name of "Sara." She has gotten herself into a "terrible fix" or two because of her inability to reject undesirable would-be suitors. These gentlemen catch her in a moment of weakness--while she's eating unaccompanied.
The first "fix" occurred over a year ago. Sara was employed at a local craft store and often lunched at a sushi restaurant. As she got into the car one day after work, she announced, "It seems like I have a date with a Guatemalan waiter." The waiter's English was incomprehensible, but that didn't matter. Sara is fluent in Spanish. She didn't want to go out with the waiter, but she didn't know how to respond to his request for a date and her phone number. "It was the only thing I could think to do," was her explanation when I asked why she had accepted his invitation and given him her number.
On her cell phone, she recorded a message in Spanish to the waiter telling him she "couldn't" go out with him. He called her 26 times attempting to reach her. He finally gave up. Sara hasn't returned to that sushi restaurant even though she loves sushi.
The second "fix" occurred last week. Tuesdays are long days for Sara as she stays at school from 8:30 am until 5:10 pm. She finds some place to eat dinner and then walks to her Institute of Religion class (7:00 to 8:30 pm) across the street from the college. She's eaten at Dairy Queen the last two weeks. The first week, she apparently caught the eye of a male employee there. The next week, the guy (who Sara estimates to be about 25 years old) was just getting off work when Sara arrived. He sat by her as she ate and they ended up talking for 2 hours. Guess what? He asked for her phone number. Guess what else? She gave it to him. "It was the only thing I could think to do," she again told me.
Mr. DQ has called Sara 4 times and she hasn't answered because she hasn't been near her phone when he's called. Not to worry, though, because Mr. DQ hasn't given up. He called our home phone last night. Sara told him that it wasn't "a good time to talk." I suspect he will call again.
Mark said that she should have given him "the telephone number to the Rejection Hotline."
The other night, Sara and I stopped at another eating establishment to pick up dinner for the rest of the family. She asked, "You're not going to leave me here alone, are you?"
In a related situation, Sara met one of Rachelle's former would-be suitors at her religion class. Rachelle had no trouble giving him the shaft, but Sara wasn't quite as assertive. Now another guy has Sara's number.
I think some assertiveness training is in order for our Ado Annie. Either that or she needs to give out the number to the Rejection Hotline.
The first "fix" occurred over a year ago. Sara was employed at a local craft store and often lunched at a sushi restaurant. As she got into the car one day after work, she announced, "It seems like I have a date with a Guatemalan waiter." The waiter's English was incomprehensible, but that didn't matter. Sara is fluent in Spanish. She didn't want to go out with the waiter, but she didn't know how to respond to his request for a date and her phone number. "It was the only thing I could think to do," was her explanation when I asked why she had accepted his invitation and given him her number.
On her cell phone, she recorded a message in Spanish to the waiter telling him she "couldn't" go out with him. He called her 26 times attempting to reach her. He finally gave up. Sara hasn't returned to that sushi restaurant even though she loves sushi.
The second "fix" occurred last week. Tuesdays are long days for Sara as she stays at school from 8:30 am until 5:10 pm. She finds some place to eat dinner and then walks to her Institute of Religion class (7:00 to 8:30 pm) across the street from the college. She's eaten at Dairy Queen the last two weeks. The first week, she apparently caught the eye of a male employee there. The next week, the guy (who Sara estimates to be about 25 years old) was just getting off work when Sara arrived. He sat by her as she ate and they ended up talking for 2 hours. Guess what? He asked for her phone number. Guess what else? She gave it to him. "It was the only thing I could think to do," she again told me.
Mr. DQ has called Sara 4 times and she hasn't answered because she hasn't been near her phone when he's called. Not to worry, though, because Mr. DQ hasn't given up. He called our home phone last night. Sara told him that it wasn't "a good time to talk." I suspect he will call again.
Mark said that she should have given him "the telephone number to the Rejection Hotline."
The other night, Sara and I stopped at another eating establishment to pick up dinner for the rest of the family. She asked, "You're not going to leave me here alone, are you?"
In a related situation, Sara met one of Rachelle's former would-be suitors at her religion class. Rachelle had no trouble giving him the shaft, but Sara wasn't quite as assertive. Now another guy has Sara's number.
I think some assertiveness training is in order for our Ado Annie. Either that or she needs to give out the number to the Rejection Hotline.
Monday, October 19, 2009
New Shoes or A Hearty Bowl
This is for you, Susan:
BACKGROUND INFORMATION, SECTION 1: Mark's latest food addiction is a Jack in the Box "hearty bowl." I've never tasted one, but it looks like a mixture of "hashbrowns," bacon, sausage, cream sauce and cheese. Mark likes his sans cream sauce and cheese. I can get him to do almost anything (except maybe homework) for a hearty bowl. If I'm running errands and Lance is home supervising homework, I will often phone home to see if Mark is engaged in a productive activity (i.e. doing homework). If he is, I'll usually stop by JITB and purchase a hearty bowl to take home. My reward is a hug, a kiss and a flowery expression of gratitude.
BACKGROUND INFORMATION, SECTION 2: The shoelaces broke in Mark's shoes that I purchased a month or so ago. They were elasticized laces and "worked" differently than normal ones. Mark was convinced that the shoes could no longer be worn and has begged for new shoes for several days. Lance tried to convince him that he didn't need new shoes, just new laces. Mark disagreed. He tried to win me over to seeing the shoe situation his way.
During my errand-running this afternoon, I called home to check on things ("things" meaning whether or not homework was being done). Mark asked if I planned to purchase new shoes for him and if I would get him a hearty bowl. When I mentioned that I was only going to buy laces instead of shoes unless he had the money to buy shoes, he replied, "Okay, you can just get me the laces. Will you still get me a hearty bowl, though?"
I returned home with shoelaces and hearty bowls (1 for Mark and 1 for Zach). I'm a good mom--today.
BACKGROUND INFORMATION, SECTION 1: Mark's latest food addiction is a Jack in the Box "hearty bowl." I've never tasted one, but it looks like a mixture of "hashbrowns," bacon, sausage, cream sauce and cheese. Mark likes his sans cream sauce and cheese. I can get him to do almost anything (except maybe homework) for a hearty bowl. If I'm running errands and Lance is home supervising homework, I will often phone home to see if Mark is engaged in a productive activity (i.e. doing homework). If he is, I'll usually stop by JITB and purchase a hearty bowl to take home. My reward is a hug, a kiss and a flowery expression of gratitude.
BACKGROUND INFORMATION, SECTION 2: The shoelaces broke in Mark's shoes that I purchased a month or so ago. They were elasticized laces and "worked" differently than normal ones. Mark was convinced that the shoes could no longer be worn and has begged for new shoes for several days. Lance tried to convince him that he didn't need new shoes, just new laces. Mark disagreed. He tried to win me over to seeing the shoe situation his way.
During my errand-running this afternoon, I called home to check on things ("things" meaning whether or not homework was being done). Mark asked if I planned to purchase new shoes for him and if I would get him a hearty bowl. When I mentioned that I was only going to buy laces instead of shoes unless he had the money to buy shoes, he replied, "Okay, you can just get me the laces. Will you still get me a hearty bowl, though?"
I returned home with shoelaces and hearty bowls (1 for Mark and 1 for Zach). I'm a good mom--today.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Anything for Money
Lance and I were apartment managers in Mountain View, California the first year of Annica's life. We lived in kind of a rough neighborhood where drug deals and episodes of domestic violence were common. In fact, Lance, at my insistence, knocked on our upstairs neighbor's door and interrupted a drug bust. (Of course, I didn't KNOW a drug bust was taking place. I had just seen the paramedics haul someone out to the ambulance from that apartment, and I asked Lance to check on those tenants.) The police thought Lance had come to buy drugs. We reported a domestic violence situation to the police when we heard our next-door neighbors violently fighting and throwing furniture.
Needless to say, baby Annica and I didn't venture outside our apartment too often unless we were accompanied by others. We tended to occupy ourselves by playing with toys, reading books and listening to music in our little apartment. I also stayed busy with apartment complex paperwork, showing apartments, tending to the pool and being on cockroach watch. (Our roach motels had many occupants. "They check in, but they never check out.")
Another one of my diversions was watching television. I became addicted to "Leave it to Beaver" reruns. I rarely missed an episode of that show. I liked it so much that I decided to have my own version of Eddie Haskell. But, I digress. The other television show that captured my attention was "Anything for Money." The aim of the show was to get unsuspecting people to become involved in strange pranks/scenarios for as little money as possible. Of course, the people had no idea they were being "played" as the scenarios were, in most cases, cleverly disguised as real-life situations. Seriously, though, who could possibly think that climbing into a barrel to exchange clothes with a mostly-naked man could be a true, real-life situation?
I was completely fascinated to see how many people would do just about anything (i.e. swallow a live goldfish, allow themselves to be wrapped in aluminum foil and be rotisseried on top of a car, break up with a stranger's "girlfriend," etc.) for just a few dollars. The amount paid for each prank ranged from $10 to over $100.
The show didn't stay on the air for very long, but it's impact on me has been long-lasting. Every time I learn of a shady politician, a cheat or thief, someone being willing to pose for a pornographic magazine or an individual who tries to monetarily capitalize on their "15 minutes of fame" (and the list goes on), I think of that show. Yes, it's true--many people would do just about anything for money.
Needless to say, baby Annica and I didn't venture outside our apartment too often unless we were accompanied by others. We tended to occupy ourselves by playing with toys, reading books and listening to music in our little apartment. I also stayed busy with apartment complex paperwork, showing apartments, tending to the pool and being on cockroach watch. (Our roach motels had many occupants. "They check in, but they never check out.")
Another one of my diversions was watching television. I became addicted to "Leave it to Beaver" reruns. I rarely missed an episode of that show. I liked it so much that I decided to have my own version of Eddie Haskell. But, I digress. The other television show that captured my attention was "Anything for Money." The aim of the show was to get unsuspecting people to become involved in strange pranks/scenarios for as little money as possible. Of course, the people had no idea they were being "played" as the scenarios were, in most cases, cleverly disguised as real-life situations. Seriously, though, who could possibly think that climbing into a barrel to exchange clothes with a mostly-naked man could be a true, real-life situation?
I was completely fascinated to see how many people would do just about anything (i.e. swallow a live goldfish, allow themselves to be wrapped in aluminum foil and be rotisseried on top of a car, break up with a stranger's "girlfriend," etc.) for just a few dollars. The amount paid for each prank ranged from $10 to over $100.
The show didn't stay on the air for very long, but it's impact on me has been long-lasting. Every time I learn of a shady politician, a cheat or thief, someone being willing to pose for a pornographic magazine or an individual who tries to monetarily capitalize on their "15 minutes of fame" (and the list goes on), I think of that show. Yes, it's true--many people would do just about anything for money.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Altered State
Our usual morning routine consists of me driving Zachary to Seminary and then an hour later Lance taking Mark up to the church where they pick Zachary and two other girls up and drive them 6 miles to school. I transport Sara to school in Bellevue.
This morning our routine was altered because Lance taught Seminary. I had to take Mark up to the church to meet Lance, Zachary and the girls afterward. When we arrived at the church, Lance and company were waiting for Mark in the car.
Mark asked me, "Are you ready for the transfer of hostages?"
This morning our routine was altered because Lance taught Seminary. I had to take Mark up to the church to meet Lance, Zachary and the girls afterward. When we arrived at the church, Lance and company were waiting for Mark in the car.
Mark asked me, "Are you ready for the transfer of hostages?"
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