Emergency Supplies

I can't count the number of times my kids have come to me at the "last minute" requesting supplies for school or a church activity. Just yesterday, 10 minutes before we left for school (and he/she had to be on time to school for a major exam), one of my children (who shall remain nameless to protect the guilty) said he/she needed tabbed dividers. I nervously bounded upstairs to look in our supply closet hoping that the extra ones I'd bought for the last emergency were still there. Lo and behold (and thankfully) they were. Very late Sunday night another child (who shall also remain nameless and is another chronic offender) said he/she needed posterboard to complete a school assignment that night. Yes, we had that, too, but it was semi-bent and dusty. Who cared at that point?

I wish these were isolated incidents. They're not. Maybe your children are perfect and you never find yourself in these types of situations. Maybe they're like my almost-perfect children, and you do. In that case, let me offer some advice as a semi-seasoned mother of children ranging in age from nearly 13 to nearly 25.

Buy in bulk before the school year begins. This is approximately the amount of school supplies you should have on hand for those (in my case) not-so-rare emergencies. You may need to devote one room of your house to store these items.

At least 10 protractors--and place them in various locations throughout your home
5 sets of tabbed dividers
5 extra 3-ringed binders
6 boxes of pencils
6 boxes of pens
10 glue sticks
5 pink erasers
3 or more packages of lined (college or wide-ruled) 8.5x11" paper
3 or more packages of copy/printer paper
2 packages of card stock in assorted colors
5 Sharpies
5 Flair markers
3 boxes of crayons
3 boxes of colored pencils
2 bottles of white-out
2 printer cartridges in black
2 printer cartridges in color
Prismacolors (expensive!)
10 pieces of posterboard (white and colored)
3 staplers
2 boxes of staples
1 large container of paper clips
1 large box of sheet protectors
10 pair of scissors
10 rolls of tape
2 rolls of masking tape
2 rolls of duct tape
Pain killers (for you)
5 pocket folders
5 report folders
5 packs of 3x5" cards (lined and unlined)
5 packs of 4x6" cards (lined and unlined)
2 dictionaries
A stack of blank CDs
5 flash drives
large pack of Post-It Notes
5 calculators (including 1 scientific one)
A plethora of batteries in various sizes

Have I omitted anything? If so, I probably have it somewhere in my house.

Thank-you Fight

"Thank you, again, Mom," Mark said after I bought a fast-food meal at the Golden Arches today (bunless burgers and grilled chicken salad, of course).

"Why do you always have to have the last word, Mark?" asked Zachary.

This started a thank-you "fight" of sorts between Sara, Zachary and Mark, with "thank-yous" being flung fast-paced at me. Since the expressions were zinging so quickly, I mostly can't remember who said what, but the comments went something like this:

"Thank you, again, again."

"Thanks, Mom. Oh, I can't remember if I said 'thank you,' so thank you again."

"Thanks for saying 'you're welcome,' Mom."

"Thanks for thanking Mom for saying 'you're welcome.'"

"I forgot again whether or not I said 'thank you,' so thank you."

Then Sara said, "I'm going to be mature about this and not feel the need to get in the last word, but thank you, Mom."

Of course, Mark had to add, "Thanks for putting up with all of this, Mom."

It was all in good fun. I think.

The Sausage Fairy

Perhaps you have heard of the Tooth Fairy or the Good Fairy. Have you ever heard of the Sausage Fairy? I didn't think so. The Sausage Fairy is a beloved and regular visitor at our house. She seems to know just when she's needed most and arrives, warm sausages in hand, to deliver sausages to a boy in the upper bunk. She even provides the plate, fork and a beverage.

She knows when it's most important for said bunk boy to wake up on time and with a good attitude. Her magic never fails. Bunk boy discovers the plated sausages near his pillow and the beverage on the bunk ladder. He smiles, props himself up on one elbow and quickly devours the food. He promptly climbs out of bed, deposits the dishes in the kitchen sink and happily gets ready for the day.

Sometimes the Sausage Fairy leaves a few extra links in a pan on the stove for others in the family to enjoy. How we love the Sausage Fairy!

Lest you feel sorry for the boy in the lower bunk, please know that the Oatmeal Fairy and the Scrambled Egg Fairy alternately visit him at 5:30 each morning of the school week. These fairies also deliver vitamins and Ovaltine-laced milk.

What kind of fairy would be most helpful in your household?

False Sense of Immunity

In an effort to be more humble and to save others who might otherwise find themselves the victims of a scam, I'm "coming clean" on something that happened earlier this week. I acted stupidly. Mark said, "You weren't stupid, just arrogant." Stupid or arrogant? Label me as you see fit.

Spotting a scam? Piece of cake! Or so I thought. Whenever I'd see or hear a report on someone being scammed, I thought something like that would never happen to me. Famous last words.

It all started with an ad for a car on Craiglist that looked a little too good to be true. I emailed the seller. A few little red flags went up, but not enough to discourage me too much. More emails were exchanged and I received a very official-looking "invoice" from "ebay." I did a little bit of research. I should have done more. However, thanks to a series of very fortunate, blessed events, none of our money was lost. The police officers were kind, but wondered why I hadn't seen this on the news. (I rarely watch the news.)

It could have been worse. My pride was hurt, but I still have my money. We still need a car.